I WOULD RATHER DIE

I received an envelope from my health insurance company's pharmacy benefit manager. The outside of the envelope said I needed to act or my prescription costs would go up. The envelope contained three sheets of blank paper. I am not exaggerating. There was nothing but three entirely blank sheets of paper.

My husband had received a similar envelope, but at least his envelope contained instructions. He had to call and have his prescriptions switched to their mail order pharmacy rather than the local pharmacy where we've been getting our prescriptions filled for over a decade. Someone had to maintain the system that sent out the letters. Someone had to answer his phone call. Someone had to contact the prescribing physician to have the prescription transferred to the mail order pharmacy. The prescription needs to be individually shipped directly to our house rather than delivered, along with a cartload of other drugs, to the local pharmacy. That seems like a lot of overhead, but what do I know?

Presuming that this was their intention with my three blank pages, I looked online at the account they made me set up for administering my prescriptions. It said I had to call them. I called the phone number they listed. I had to give my date of birth and zip code to a machine and explain in a few words why I was calling. Not shockingly, it didn't understand when I asked why they had mailed me three blank pieces of paper, so I was handed off to a person.

Then again I had to give my date of birth and zip code to a customer service person whose first language was definitely not English. (I have nothing against people who speak English as a second language—my husband's first language is not English. But I do have something against outsourcing customer service lines to other countries where companies can underpay people.) 

She told me I had no prescriptions on file. Weird since I had gotten a different letter from them saying that I had recently filled a prescription, including what it was, and that it was super important for me to take it as prescribed.

She put me on hold then came back and told me she was transferring me to United Healthcare. 

I am not insured by United Healthcare. I hung up.

So my husband dug up the letter he had gotten and gave me the phone number he had called. I got WORD FOR WORD the same computer script but with a different AI voice.

After I again told the machine my birthdate and zip code and that I wanted to know why they had sent me three blank pieces of paper, I got a person, this one at least US-based. I explained. She put me on hold. She came back and said she hadn't forgotten me and put me back on hold. And again. 

Finally, she asked for my local pharmacy zip code, my prescriber's name, and for the list of medications. There is ONE. And they are going to...contact my doctor and get the prescription transferred and mailed individually directly to me.

TO BE CLEAR, this prescription costs $9.14 plus $5 shipping for a 90-day supply through Cost Plus Drugs. This cost includes the cost of manufacturing, a 15% markup, and $5 in pharmacy labor.

Can someone with a Nobel Prize in economics explain to me how OptumRx's paying for half an hour of a customer service representative's time, plus all the other IT infrastructure, in order to transfer the prescription to their internal mail order pharmacy rather than my local pharmacy could possibly result in any institutional savings on a prescription that costs $1.20/mo to manufacture?

I finally got an appointment to see my primary care provider, who was utterly unhelpful. I'm getting semaglutide from the internet. She won't write me a prescription so that my insurance will cover it, despite the fact that I fit the prescribing guidelines. She won't write a prescription for anti-anxiety meds unless I make quarterly visits. She insists I need blood work, a mammogram, and a visit to a gynecologist. No. I'm not doing it. 

This is the last straw for me. 

I would honestly rather die than "be a smart healthcare consumer," make another phone call, look at another website, read another explanation of benefits, make another appointment that won't be for four to six months in the future, choose another health plan and cross my fingers that it will be the "cheapest" option.

I'm out. I will die when god calls me home rather than participate in this corrupt, stupid system for one day longer. No more meds, no more tests, no more visits, no more. I don't care if a mammogram or a PAP test would detect cancer. I'm not getting chemotherapy or surgery. I'm not taking any more blood pressure meds. If I have a stroke or a heart attack, nobody call 911. Just let me die. IDGAF.